Friday, August 29, 2008

My Heart Hurts!


Chuck talked to me a lot yesterday. Dave told me not to talk to Chuck, or even look at him. But, it made my heart hurt, so I had to. Chuck was crying and saying that Dave hurts his feelings all the time. He makes him sit in that sissy chair and makes him ashamed in front of the audience. He told me all about his childhood and how “Buttons” the clown touched him with mittens. I feel really sorry for Chuck now. He’s like a brother to me.

Love,

Ted E. Bare

Wednesday, August 27, 2008

Last Night.

The LAPD came to the door in the middle of the night. Chuck was found wandering around very late and the car was crashed into a tree in a canyon. Chuck told the cops that he lived in New York with a rich man, but one of the cops knows Dave; he’s seen his trailers on YouTube, so they called on the radio and found us. Chuck didn’t want to get out of the police car and he was yelling: “That is not my house! Don’t make me go in there!” It was a big mess and he woke up half the neighborhood. I think Chuck is losing his mind.


Love,
Ted E. Bare

Monday, August 25, 2008

I Am So Sad!


This weekend was not good. Every time I thought things would calm down, Chuck did something to make Dave mad. I don’t know why I stick up for him and talk Dave out of sending him away, because he turns me into a liar when I tell Dave, “Chuck is not so bad. It’s just how he is.” I think Dave loves and hates Chuck. I think Chuck just hates everybody. I’m not sure I can help him. It makes me sad.

Love,
Ted E. Bare

Friday, August 22, 2008

Rehab for Puppets?

Oh oh! David is thinking about sending Chuck to a rehab place for bad puppets. I overheard him talking to a doctor on the phone today. Even though, I don’t like Chuck when he picks on me and hurts my feelings, I don’t really want him to be sent away. I think he will only get worse.

Anxiously yours,

Ted E. Bare

Tuesday, August 19, 2008

We Made it Home Alive!

We’re back home. I already miss Adelaide. I don’t miss the plane ride though. It scares me. I don’t like the loud noise and people always throw the shipping trunk Dave keeps me in. And, it always takes soooo long to get out of there! I get scared of the tight and dark trunk and I always cry to myself, but no one hears me.


All my love,
Ted E. Bare

Thursday, August 14, 2008

I am Someone's FAVORITE!


Tonight was great. I met a nice couple who told Dave that I am their favorite. It made me blush. I like hearing things like thaaat, but I try not to let it get to my head. Dave says that means I am modest and I don’t have a big ego. It’s a trait everyone loves about me.

Egolessly yours,

Ted E. Bare

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

Breakfast in Awe-stralia...

Dave and I are sitting in front of the ‘puter together. He is drinking a herbal tea and I am drinking my hot cocoa. We’re reading Chuck’s blog and Dave is shaking his head a lot. I don’t think he has come up with a strategy that will put Chuck in his place.

I can feel this is all going to blow up in Chuck’s face soon.

Poor Chuck is digging himself into a self-made hole.

Yours always,

Ted E. Bare

Friday, August 8, 2008

The End of a David Strassman Show


My favorite moments are at the end of the show when people get up and clap for a long time. Clapping is so much fun. I wish my paws could meet in the middle so I can clap. Oh well.

I feel so proud of Dave, sometimes even Chuck and myself. I forget about everything and lose myself... When I find myself again, I'm happy. There is no talking, just bowing and clapping. I love that! It feels like we are the funnest guys alive! -- EVER! It's like when I eat dark chocolate. I love chocolates!!! And, I always want more. Tell Chuck I'm not a turtle!!!

Love forever,
Ted E. Bare

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

Thank You, Adelaide!

We had two sold out shows tonight! I sure love Adelaide! They laugh real loud! The people are so nice even if the Trams are weird. The trams don’t go anywhere. I don’t understand it. That’s so funny. I wanted to go out and have a curry after the show but Dave said he’s jetlagged and wanted to go to sleep. That’s okay. I love to sleep.


Nighty night,
Ted E.

Monday, August 4, 2008

We're in Australia!

Yippee! David decided not to ground Chuck until we get home. He doesn’t want Chuck to ruin the shows. There is one more day till the show in Adelaide.

I like working with David Strassman, (I call him Dave!) because he is the best ventriloquist on the planet and I woooooove him.

Your friend always,
Ted E. Bare